10 Annoying Things Guests Do - But Shouldn't {San Diego Wedding Photographer}

Maybe you think you know everything about wedding etiquette, but I guarantee that there are many offenses that guests don't realize they're committing when they attend friends' and family members' nuptials. To make sure you don't make a major snafu, heed this list of the worst social crimes a wedding guest can commit.

1.Wear white. Sure, wedding gowns these days can be blush or even black. But, even if the bride isn't wearing white, that doesn't mean you can. And if you know that the bride is wearing a color other than white, try not to don a dress of the same exact shade. This is her day, after all.

2. Crash the bride's room. The second most common faux pas I see is when friends outside the immediate bridal party crash the bride's dressing room just to wish her well. The gesture is absolutely gracious -- but the timing isn't. If you weren't invited to hang out with the bride while she gets ready, wait to share your congratulations at the wedding.

3. Misuse your smart phone. If it were up to me, everyone would leave his or her smartphone at home when attending a wedding. From guest snapping photos during the ceremony instead of paying attention to the moment, to posting photos of the bride and groom on social media without asking, guests tend to use smart phones in ways that are disruptive and rude. If you can't part with your technology, at the very least turn the ringer off for the ceremony.

4. Change your seat. Many guests look through the seating cards to find out who else is sitting where. Figuring out a seating plan was a difficult enough process for the bride and groom and having to deal with musical chairs (or requests for a change) is just too much when they're trying to enjoy their special day..

5. Make side comments during speeches. One of the most annoying thing guests do is not pay attention while speeches are being made and continue to chatter, making it difficult for those that care to listen. When it is speech time: HUSH! Yes, that also means keeping your whispered comments and commentary to yourself until after the speeches have ended.

6. Swap your food order. Usually you are asked for your meal preference on the RSVP. This is for a reason: The caterer or hotel requires a pretty close to accurate count of who's eating what so that they may order the correct quantities. I have attended many weddings where someone decides that they like what the guest next to them was presented with and they "change their order," leaving a person with dietary restrictions without their meal of choice.

7. Complain about minimal costs. While the bride and groom are your hosts for the evening, they may not be able to cover every single cost, such as parking at their venue. Granted it is a gracious offering when there is no charge, but in the event the wedding you attend has not arranged for paid parking, please do not make negative comments. Each person has their own set of priorities and budget -- if you are close enough to be invited and attend the wedding, then you should be respectful and not make negative or hurtful comments.

8. Drink too much. Weddings are celebrations and many take place on a Friday or Saturday evening so no one is inclined to leave early. But this also gives leeway to imbibing a bit too much. Don't get sloshed and try to drive home. The bridal party doesn't want to manage your lack of management -- they want to stay and enjoy the fun! (This is when services like Uber comes to the rescue.)

9. Grab décor. Table decorations belong to the rental company that provided them unless otherwise indicated. Guests that walk away with decorative votives or pretty napkin rings don't realize that the bride and groom will be charged for these items when the total count is not returned.

10. Hang around too late. Even if there's an afterparty that ends wee into the morning hours, at some point, the bride and groom want to have some alone time. Therefore, don't begin an impromptu after-afterparty in their bridal suite or try to convince the groom to continue on at a bar that opens at 6 a.m. The party is over when the bride and groom say it is - respect that.

Article Credit: 

Renee Strauss   - Bridal stylist, star of "Brides of Beverly Hills"

Guest Blog Post: How to Avoid Being Wedding Poor - Jessica Geiszler of Stellar J Productions {San Diego Wedding Photography}

How to Avoid Being Wedding Poor

Stellar J Productions has a knack for making champagne dreams happen on a beer budget. Here are some tips from the Stellar J team on how to avoid being wedding poor. Take a look and see what techniques might apply to the planning of your special day – curbing unnecessary costs will help you to maximize on your wedding investment! 

• House wine is fine. Guests love free booze, plain and simple. There’s no need to stress over brands or harvests or the age of the vines and the climate they’ve grown up in – because there’s a very good chance that most of your guests won’t know the difference between a $10 bottle of Barefoot Merlot and a $100 bottle of Mendoza Malbec. If you love wine and you want to splurge, go for it – but consider channeling those expenditures toward a special bottle for your parents or bridal party, and order whatever is available in house for the rest of your party attendees. 

•  Consider all-in-ones. Many linen companies also provide furniture rentals. A lot of caterers offer table settings. Limos can manage transportation for bachelor/bachelorette parties as well as wedding day festivities. Bridal shower venues can double as locations for rehearsal dinners. HOTELS DO IT ALL! You get the picture. Combine services whenever possible to simplify the planning process and avoid paying extra on service and delivery fees.

• Give yourself time to shop around. The sooner you start thinking about wedding day details, the longer you have to capitalize on killer deals on things like décor, cards, gifts, hotels, beauty services – even undergarments! Make a list of everything you’ll need. Then begin adding bridal shows, trunk shows, open houses, department store sales and the like to your personal calendar. Plan time on the weekends to visit area malls, thrift stores and swap meets. Identify the holidays that match your color scheme and hit craft warehouses and supermarkets as soon as that holiday has ended, for an extra 25-75% off! You can even sign up to receive special offers via email from companies like Groupon and Living Social. 

• Condense the bridal party. More people means more flowers, more thank-you cards and gifts, more hair/make-up appointments, more rehearsal dinner plates, more drinks, and let’s be real, more drama. Pick a few people who are very close to you and find roles for the then identify a few roles for the close friends and family who didn’t make the cut; you might be surprised by how happy they will be to do a scripture reading or share a toast! 

Look local. The closer the vendor, the cheaper the delivery fee. If your wedding venue is 60 miles from the florist you hired, understand that you’ll likely be covering a gas/mileage fee – smaller companies might even tack on a charge for a refrigerated truck rental. Caterers will follow a similar pattern, as will photographers – especially if you pick one who needs to fly in for the event and book overnight accommodations. In any situation, it’s always good to support your local economy (or the local economy of your favorite party destination)! 

• Attend free dance lessons. San Diegans can visit In Cahoots, a country line dance bar, pretty much any day of the week for a free line dance lesson and a “couples” dance lesson. You’ll learn staples like the Boot Scootin’ Boogie, Cotton Eyed Joe and Cupid Shuffle, as well as first dance favorites like the Two-Step and the Waltz. If money is tight and you want to look polished and poised during your first dance, you should definitely try the free stuff before you opt for the "for-a-fee" stuff.  

   

•  Hire a planner. A planner can assist with the vendor negotiation process and can review contracts to ensure all possible perks have been plugged in. They may be able to negotiate chargers into the table set-up, or audio to the ceremony plan – sometimes they can arrange to have leftover alcohol delivered to your bridal suite. These folks know the industry and WANT to help you make the most out of your special day so don’t be afraid to take advantage of their connections and special talents.

 Jessica Geiszler, the J in Stellar J Productions, has been working in the events industry for the past 15 years. With experience spanning the public, private and non-profit industries, she has effectively planned everything from small parties to million-dollar fundraising campaigns. Connect with Stellar J Productions on Facebook, Twitter, WeddingWire, Google+ and Pinterest to stay on top of the latest wedding and event trends